Guest House Paradiso (1999)
Adrian Edmondson: Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba
Photos
Quotes
-
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Chef's hurt himself.
Richard Twat : How badly?
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Indescribably badly. He hit his head on a frying pan seventeen times.
-
Richard Twat : Will you stop making those owl noises?
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Sorry
Richard Twat : Now come on
[Rich slips and lands with his eye in the candle]
Richard Twat : AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH
[Lights go out then Eddy lights another candle]
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Rich are you alright?
Richard Twat : Candle in the eye.
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : What?
Richard Twat : Candle in the eye
[rich points to his eye]
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Oh righto
[Eddy shoves the candle in Richies unburnt eye]
Richard Twat : AAAARRRGGGGGHHH
-
Richard Twat : [opens the till and finds it empty] What are the advance bookings, like?
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Ah, not too good.
Richard Twat : [shuts the till] Ooooooooh, God!
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Come on, Richie, it's not that bad.
Richard Twat : Yes, it is, I just trapped the tip of my penis in the till drawer!
Mrs Foxfur : [Eddie open the till] Oh, Mr Twat!
Richard Twat : It's Thwaite,
[whispers]
Richard Twat : I thought you said the guests have gone.
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : I thought she was dead.
-
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : [Explosion. Miss Carbonara raises an enquiring eyebrow] Mice. Basque separatist mice.
-
Richard Twat : What about that ring
Mrs Nice : I never take it off.
Richard Twat : Well what about the watch then? Is that expensive?
Mr Nice : Oh, it's just a cheap copy.
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Well that will do, the pawnbroker is very shortsighted.
Richard Twat : EDDIE! means, that you don't need a watch in paradise. Time... stops here
[Mr. Nice hands over the watch]
-
Gina Carbonara : Good evening, Mr. Twat.
Richard Twat : It's cunt. Damn... again. Gina Carbonara! The melons from Milan!
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : Yeah, the nipples from Naples!
Richard Twat : The rump from Rome!
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : The rectum from Reykjavík! Hang on, that's not quite right, is it?
-
Richard Twat : [Richie puts on Eddie's glasses] How do I look?
Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba : I don't know I can't see a fucking thing!