Guest House Paradiso (1999)
Bill Nighy: Mr. Johnson
Quotes
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Richard Twat : I trust you've slept well?
Mr Johnson : We had rather a rough night actually.
Richard Twat : Ah well, the perils of adultery.
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Mr Johnson : I merely brushed your arm!
Richard Twat : Well, we have already established that you're a liar, Mr Jones.
Mr Johnson : Look, Mr Twat...
Richard Twat : It's pronounced "Thwaite"!
Mr Johnson : Well, It's spelled twat.
[pointing at Richie's name on the desk]
Mr Johnson : T-W-A-T Twat!
Richard Twat : Could you keep your voice down please? We do have normal guests, as well.
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Richard Twat : I trust you two both washed.
Mr Johnson : Actually, the water was cold.
Richard Twat : That's no reason not to wash, is it? Good grief, we are British, you know. We invented cold showers to stop people masturbating. Oh, I see, maybe that's why you are so upset about the lack of hot water.