The Pink Panther (2006)
Emily Mortimer: Nicole
Photos
Quotes
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Nicole : Would you like me to stay behind and help you?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : That is a generous offer, Nicole, but I am quite sensitive to office gender politics. And in today's world, the slightest gesture can be misinterpreted as harrasment. And it is late, and I would prefer not to put you or me into that delicate situation. Agreed?
Nicole : Yes, I agree.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : [gives her a quick kiss on her lips] Well, lets seal it with a kiss. And I'll get back to work.
[slaps her on her butt as she goes out]
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Yes, politics. Where greed wears the mask of morality.
Nicole : That's good. Did you say that?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : [looks around] Yes, I did.
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Nicole : Do you live by yourself, Inspector?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Yes, I do.
Nicole : Do you get lonely?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : No, not really. Not since the Internet.
Nicole : Well, that takes care of that. And welcome to Paris.
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Nicole : I've been looking for you two everywhere. Where the hell have you been?
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Clouseau.
Ticket Checker : I'm sorry, but your name is not on the list.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Not on the list?
Ponton : Dreyfus must have made sure you cannot get in.
[Nicole makes a bird call, motioning for Clouseau and Ponton to meet her]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Ponton.
[he hums as he and Ponton stroll away from the main gate to meet Nicole]
Nicole : Inspector, here is your bag.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Good work, Nicole.
Ponton : What is that?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Camouflage. Let's go. Nicole.
Nicole : Yes?
Nicole : One last thing.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Yes?
[Clouseau removes her glasses]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : It's evening, and you look beautiful without your glasses.
Nicole : Thank you, inspector.
[she squints, and bumps into a tree]
Nicole : Oh, ow!
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau : [wearing wallpaper pattern disguises] Good work, Ponton. We're in. Look! It's the killer! After him! Change outfits.
[They take off their masks. The palace guard arrives]
Palace Guard : Stop! Turn around. Who are you? What are you doing here?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : We are-- We are, we are two-- We are-- I'll tell you exactly who we are.
Ponton : Yes.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : We are -
[Nicole arrives]
Nicole : I have been looking for you two everywhere. Where the hell have you been?
Palace Guard : You know these two?
Nicole : [slightly annoyed] Of course I know them. They are Xania's back-up dancers. They go on in the third act with the Komodo dragon and the snow machine. Why do you think they are dressed like that, for fun?
Palace Guard : Prove it.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : I don't have to prove -
[the palace guard cocks his gun; Clouseau starts to dance and Ponton joins in the dance number while Xania continues singing]
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Nicole : [Clouseau and Ponton pant for breath after they've finished dancing] Can't you see these dancers are exhausted? Go and fetch them some water.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : [the palace guard leaves] That was fantastic.
Nicole : [giggles] You think so?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : You are... an amazing woman.
[He approaches Nicole to kiss her, only to be interrupted by Ponton]
Ponton : Inspector, the killer.
[Clouseau returns and kisses Nicole]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Now I am ready to catch a killer.
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Nicole?
Nicole : Yes?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : May I be very frank with you?
Nicole : Of course.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : You have put on a ton of weight. Now, what I do when I get a little heavy...
[removes his magnifying glass spectacles]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Never mind.
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau : Are you feeling better?
Nicole : Yes, thank you. You are so good at it! Where did you learn that?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau : I used to practice on mannequins, pillows; but frankly, it was the expression on your face that told me that you needed it.