There are some movies where stupid things happen in order to give us thrills, chills, or tears. Swashbuckler is not that kind of movie. This is a movie that is just stupid, without any payoff gained by being stupid.
You want to know how it's stupid? Try lines like, `I have one master; his name is Darkness.' Then, to make the line even worse, don't deliver it in the over-the-top, cackling manner of someone who might be insane enough to really believe it, but instead in Peter Boyle's flat Pennsylvania accent.
The movie's idea of excitement is to match larger than life heroes not against larger than life villains, but against useless stumble bums who could have been defeated by any jerk with a pocket knife. The movie's idea of romance is simply to display Genevieve Bujold's body, with no emotional exchange of any kind going on between her and Robert Shaw. The movie's idea of humor is to have Robert Shaw and James Earl Jones sit on rocks and tell each other bad limericks.
The portrayal of women in Hollywood action movies has not been an uninterrupted forward progression, as Genevieve Bujold proves here. Her principal job is to be held hostage by the incompetent villains. She is given a sword a few times, but she is useless with it. If Bujold had taken on Maureen O'Hara in any of her roles from The Black Swan, At Sword's Point, or Against All Flags, O'Hara would have taken about five seconds to run her through.
It is a crying shame that there are so few good pirate movies out there. The 1990 and 1950 versions of Treasure Island are about the best there are. Pirates of the Caribbean and Cutthroat Island are silly, but genuinely fun. Beyond that, even the so-called classics of the genre have little to recommend them: The Black Swan has a revolting hero, and Captain Blood is rendered bearable not by Errol Flynn's most wooden performance, but by the energetic villainy of Basil Rathbone. But even The Black Swan and Captain Blood look great compared to Swashbuckler.
You want to know how it's stupid? Try lines like, `I have one master; his name is Darkness.' Then, to make the line even worse, don't deliver it in the over-the-top, cackling manner of someone who might be insane enough to really believe it, but instead in Peter Boyle's flat Pennsylvania accent.
The movie's idea of excitement is to match larger than life heroes not against larger than life villains, but against useless stumble bums who could have been defeated by any jerk with a pocket knife. The movie's idea of romance is simply to display Genevieve Bujold's body, with no emotional exchange of any kind going on between her and Robert Shaw. The movie's idea of humor is to have Robert Shaw and James Earl Jones sit on rocks and tell each other bad limericks.
The portrayal of women in Hollywood action movies has not been an uninterrupted forward progression, as Genevieve Bujold proves here. Her principal job is to be held hostage by the incompetent villains. She is given a sword a few times, but she is useless with it. If Bujold had taken on Maureen O'Hara in any of her roles from The Black Swan, At Sword's Point, or Against All Flags, O'Hara would have taken about five seconds to run her through.
It is a crying shame that there are so few good pirate movies out there. The 1990 and 1950 versions of Treasure Island are about the best there are. Pirates of the Caribbean and Cutthroat Island are silly, but genuinely fun. Beyond that, even the so-called classics of the genre have little to recommend them: The Black Swan has a revolting hero, and Captain Blood is rendered bearable not by Errol Flynn's most wooden performance, but by the energetic villainy of Basil Rathbone. But even The Black Swan and Captain Blood look great compared to Swashbuckler.