Patrick (1978)
It came from Down Under...and should've stayed there!
14 April 2004
Because I'm a fan of quality horror films, I am always on the prowl for those rare gems that occasionally surface if you dig hard enough. I'm talking about films that have slipped through the cracks of the mainstream, and, if they're lucky, have attained a second life on either Ebay or other purveyors of cult videos/DVDs.

If you're reading this, then you're probably familiar with these types of films. Rare but quality gems like `Peeping Tom,' `Eyes without a Face' (from France), `The Last Wave,' `The Night Stalker TV movie, `Ringu'(from Japan), or even the more recent `Dogs of War,' from England. Horror films that are well crafted, but have either faded into obscurity, or were never noticed by mainstream America.

Always keeping an open mind, and after seeing several references to the Australian film `Patrick' on several `best of horror' lists, I finally tracked down a copy yesterday and watched it.

Well...it took me three sittings to finish it. It was that tedious.

First of all, if there is *one* thing I cannot forgive in a studio film.it's bad acting. I can overlook bad special effects (and often do) when the film is more than 10 years old. I can also overlook (to some degree) glitches in the script, because often it's not the writer's fault that the script was ripped to shreds by the producers, director, and of course, the idiots at the studios (marketing departments and development execs). But, bad acting? There is just no excuse. There are too many strong, reliable (and affordable) actors out there to allow such mediocrity. Even in a low budget film.

But, if you can get past the horrendous acting, then you must contend with the deadly pacing, lack of imagination, and bad TV-style direction.

The concept of Patrick has a lot of potential, but unfortunately, under the amateurish hands of these filmmakers...it was never realized.

However, if you're the type of horror fan who isn't as discriminating in your taste, you could certainly do worse. I mean your local video store's horror section is filled with 98% crap, and Patrick is by no means the worst I've ever seen. (Although, that's hardly a compliment).

But, if you're like me, and you value your time, then I'd save your money AND your time and avoid this poor excuse for a horror film.

Instead, seek out well crafted (though far from perfect) rarities like the one I mentioned above, or try some of these:

. Suspiria . The Wicker Man . When a Stranger Calls . Martin (by George Romero) . The Changeling (with George C. Scott) . The Abominable Dr. Phibes . The Haunting (1963 version ONLY!) . Burnt Offerings . Freaks . Black Sunday (1960) . Horror of Dracula (1958) . The Legend of Hell House . Evil Dead 2 . The Dead Zone (by David Cronenberg)

Happy horrors!
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