1/10
Blues Brothers 2000? Slow and sloppy!
15 September 2000
I found Ackroyd to be completely horrible. He looked more like Joe Friday than Elwood Blues. His Chicago accent was forced, the dialog moved through at a horribly slow pace. There was absolutely zero comic timing in this movie. Every scene in the movie, including the musical numbers, took too long-from Elwood talking to the Penguin, to the Car chases-long shots of police cars-to the car-under-the-water routing-to the 50 car pile up that seemed to take 10 minutes.

The musical numbers-the lifeblood of the original-were completely devoid of soul. Aretha Franklin's lip-syncing in particular was horrible. Matt Guitar Murphy looked more like a broken down old man than the body-builder he did in the original. Who could believe that the `Dunn and Cropper' radio talk show could possibly exist when they both seemed to be reading off of cue cards the entire movie?

The things that we funny and subtle in the first film-Elwood's parking ability, Jake's transformation at the hands of Reverend Cleophus, the miracle performance of the Bluesmobile, the new jobs of the former band members, were hackneyed and overdone in this film.

The lack of energy from the band, though, is the coffin nail for this film.

They perform with such little life that CGI animation of a skeleton riding a skeletal horse over the stage has to be imposed during their rendition of `Ghost Rider.' This comes from the same Blues Brothers band that made the theme to Rawhide sound like a hit twenty years ago.

Finally, the movie seems too bright and too clean. The original took place at night for the most part, and seemed dungier. This film is shiny and clean and that just doesn't feel right. The new Bluesmobile didn't even look right until Elwood littered up the dashboard with trash, and-get this-the cigarette lighter worked!

Other fatal flaws: dumbing-down Elwood Blues, inserting a kid into the cast, having Elwood eat something other than dry, white toast, the shaving-cream-ball schtick, no SCMODS, no lines like `Man, I haven't been pulled over in six months.' All the jokes hit you in the face-like they all have to be explained. Complete bomb.
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