Review of Rock Rock Rock!

"Rock Rock Rock" (1956): Alan Freed was to Rock and Roll movies what Ed Wood was to sci fi: an idiot. But, I side with Wood - at least he did it for the "love". Freed was creating a market and nothing more. He was the P.T. Barnum of Pop music. Shoving known and unknown singers and other musicians in front of a camera – many for the very first time, expecting them to dub a tune – many for the first time, and expecting them to have any sort of stage presence, gave everyone the results they deserved. If these films weren't so painfully staged, they could hold up as Rock and Roll documents. As they are, they are laughable, pathetic, embarrassing collections of awkward, amateurish kids who are being scooped up, wagered upon, and thrown away by music industry investors. NONE THE LESS, if you're a fan of movies, this one is so transparent it's entertaining. Watch Alan Freed sell himself with his wide eyed, crap-eating grin as he pretends to be a band leader, or introduce the next act; watch the premier of Tuesday Weld – so young she's still a gawky teen - not the beauty of later years - as she dubs songs in the voice of Connie Francis (!); watch countless singers and groups who are getting their one shot – and were never heard from again; watch Frankie Lymon lead "his" Teenagers through a couple of their actual hits with slick professional behavior (corny as it was, the entire film is worth their performance of "I'm not a Juvenile Delinquent")… but keep in mind he was 13 years old, in 2 years would be a heroin addict, and 10 years later would be dead of an overdose; watch La Vern Baker do the dumbest song of all time ("Tra La La"); watch Chuck Berry stand on stage like a funky puppet performing "You Can't Catch Me"; watch many others make fools of themselves; and remember that only a year later, Freed would be busted for DJ payola, lose everything, and drink himself to death by the age of 32. There is some good décor detailing, incredibly lame dialog, numb-skulled plot devices, awful acting, and primitive editing… yet, I'm already in the mood to watch it again. I must have a mental problem... like those jerks who tie up traffic by slowing down and rubber-necking a car wreck