Blood Diner (1987)
7/10
An Overlooked 80's Classic
26 August 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I don't know why this film has gotten such crappy reviews, but it is a very overlooked late 80's classic! This film is not to be taken very seriously, and I think that is what people do. They read the plot summary or back of a tape or DVD and always expect a serious, straight up horror flick. Well, most people should know by now that 80's b-horror films were not always so serious. In fact, most of them were not. It's all about the campy feel. That's what makes these movies fun to watch. They are just as entertaining with comedy as they are with blood and horror. You have to take it for what it is, not for what you want it to be! The beginning has one of my favorite quotes of all time. After the Mom leaves the two little brothers home alone to go to the market because she "ran out of goddamn tampons," a NEWS guy on the radio begins talking about a man on the loose. ...and I quote, "He is armed and dangerous and has been spotted in the West Side area armed with a meat cleaver in one hand and his genitals in the other." That amuses me. You have to hear it. Anyway, the guy turns out to be the little boys' uncle who was trying to resurrect an Egyptian Goddess. He ends up being shot to death by the cops, but not before he is able to give his two nephews sacred necklaces.

Fast forward 20 years. The boys are grown up and ran a diner together. They dig up Uncle Anwar and remove his brain. He ends up in a jar with a pair of eyes attached to his brain so he can see. He also can talk! Don't ask me how. I never saw a mouth anywhere on the brain. So basically, the two brothers kill lots of young girls and cut them up into bits and pieces to put together a body that will become the Egyptian Goddess Shiitar (am I the only one who thought Shiitar was hot?). They also use the pieces to put into their food! Yummy! Great little movie here. It's full of body parts scattered everywhere, funny as hell, and just flat out entertaining even if the acting isn't so good. This is a great 80's b-horror film that is under appreciated by many. I wouldn't care to bet that half the people who left reviews didn't even watch the whole film...
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