Review of Elvis

Elvis (2005)
6/10
"It's the looks, stupid!"
24 March 2010
Just as elections are ultimately all about the economy, casting in biopics is ultimately all about looks and physical resemblance, and, no matter how satisfactory the performance may be in various regards, it will, in the end, all hinge on that. Jonathan Rhys-Myers is, without doubt, a very handsome young man. On a scale of one to ten, he'd easily rate 9 - more than enough in any normal real-life situation (club, party, disco) to have the girls flocking around you like wasps around a honey pot (and, let's be honest, far too good-looking to play Henry VIII!).

Now here's the problem: the guy that he aims to portray, on the same 1-10 scale, was about a 14 - another league altogether, in which, basically, a 9 just doesn't cut it. Sorry, Jon, to have to be so brutally frank, but you can take comfort from the fact that what you're attempting is nigh-on impossible. Many other handsome Hollywood actors (most notably, Kurt Russell) have tried and failed even more miserably.

In fact, there is only one actor I can think of offhand who could convincingly portray Elvis Presley on screen. Sadly, however, he's been unavailable for about 33 years...
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