Review of Hillbillys in a Haunted House

How can you possibly resist a movie that opens with three yokels in a convertible car – complete with horns on the radiator and driving in front of obviously fake background locations – cheerfully singing stuff like "We're on our way … to Tennessee … to the jamboree"? And if you're a true horror fanatic, I simply know you won't be able to resist the sight of Lon Chaney, John Carradine, Basil Rathbone and a random guy in a hideous gorilla suit! Welcome to "Hillbillys in a Haunted House". Barely ten minutes and four more incredibly campy songs later, however, it's painfully and permanently made clear that this is not a horror movie at all, but merely just a musical intended to kick-start the career of a handful of country singing hicks. The sequences with the aforementioned horror legends are clearly shot in one day and clumsily edited into the story afterwards. After a while, the makers don't even bother anymore to put the songs into a certain context but just place on of the characters in front of a TV as he's watching another guy singing. This goes on for two integral songs in a row, by the way. That's roughly ten minutes of footage showing the picture in picture of a farmer crooning "somebody told my story in a song". Can you imagine they lured young and enthusiast horror buffs to the drive-in theaters with this sort of stuff? The trailers and posters presumably promised monsters & mayhem, but what they got was lame singing! I hope plenty of displeased moviegoers vandalized the cinemas, ha! And yet, the singing might be awful, but when the movie attempts to narrate a story it's even more horrendous. The horror guys, Rathbone and company, are conducting secret gorilla experiments in their secluded country mansion, but they're afraid of spies from the government agency called M.O.T.H.E.R. When the three singing yokels trespass the place to spend the night they're mistaken for spies, especially when all their tricks of scaring them away with carnival attraction gimmicks fail. The film benefices from highly intellectual dialogs ("I never won any bravery contests") and masterful special effects like plastic skeletons and bed sheets ironed in the shape of ghosts. Lead actress Joi Lansing's character is named Boots, but considering the impressive pair of blouse bunnies she sticks forward, they should have named her Boobs instead. In case you fear you will be too petrified by the realism of the special effects, I'll gladly ruin the ending for you: the bad guys are captured into a trap and our heroes at the jamboree in time to win the talent contest. Surprised? Oh, and as a bonus, there are four more integrally shown country concerts at the end for your cultural viewing pleasure.