Review of Impact

Impact (2009)
1/10
Disturbingly stupid plot seeks to destroy Earth
16 April 2010
Warning: Spoilers
My wife and I watched this to its end. We did so in the misplaced hope that it would get better and that surely it could not sink further.

The acting is adequate.

The casting is adequate.

The photograpy, similarly, is adequate.

But oh my. In a 'coffee-spurting-out-of-my-nose' manner, the plot is simply ludicrous and the errors were legion. Let's make a small list.

a) Sextillion. I've never heard anyone use this word. If they mean 10 to the 21st power, why not say it? c) They had the concept of an orbit utterly wrong. Orbits aren't 'stable'; they're closed or they are not. If they're closed, they're an ellipse of some sort.

d) The orbit must have the central body at its focus - not at its geometric centre.

e) The term 'axis peak' is never used by anyone. Except in this movie. It doesn't mean anything. If you mean apogee, why not say it? Ap-oh-gee. It's not hard, really.

f) If the gravitic anomalies affect larger objects but not smaller ones, why do the oceans and the atmosphere not fly up into the sky? We see a laden container ship floating out of the sea, why isn't the sea also sucked upward? Why isn't the air rushing past in an inverted tornado? g) Nobody has manipulated gravity through electromagnetic means - the 'hero' with a straight face says that he built a machine to levitate objects in this manner. Why was he not laughed at? h) The magic device that saves the day is designed to magnetize the Moon's core and repel the hypermass causing all the woe. Take two small magnets, hold them such that they have the same poles facing each other, and let them go. One magnet will spin violently and slam into the other. It will not be ejected into the Sun.

i) The energy needed to flip this gazillion tonne mass out of the Moon has to come from somewhere.

j) I've lost the will to type.

The director should hang his head in shame. This was a very bad mini-series. I laughed at all the wrong places, I actually *wanted* the Moon to grind into the Earth so as to show the characters what utter bullshit their magical plans were.

If they had tried to repel the moon with magic it would have been more coherent.

My disbelief is easily suspended. But it has to be coherent and make sense within itself. This failed and as a result I couldn't care about the characters as they were spouting nonsense with straight faces.
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