Review of Absurd

Absurd (1981)
1/10
Horrible is what this movie is.
4 June 2010
Horrible is a film that was part of a large collection of films banned by the British Board of Film Censors in the 1980's. I've seen many of these "nasty" features just to see what all the fuss was about; to be frank, they weren't as brutal as you'd expect. Naturally, this was 25 years ago so the cinematic standard of what was conceived as vile has changed dramatically in recent times. Nevertheless, The UK's Video Recordings Act of 1984 was a notable era in horror; some titles on the list are still banned today while others have been lifted years ago. After I finish my review I'll mention some of the films I've seen from the "Video Nasty" collection.

Horrible is an effort made by Joe D'Amato. A shameful effort indeed, among a long list of shameful attempts in general. Yes, unfortunately he brought you Antropophagus: another bottom-dwelling disgrace. D'Amato is just slightly a step above the status of a porn director. This is why myself and many others refer to Italian horror cinema during the 70's and 80's as "schlocky"; virtually every facet and production value is so pitifully executed that is requires your utmost devotion to be fully appreciated. Luckily Horrible is not a porn-hybrid so I'll be able to spare you the misery of hearing about it.

The plot tells the story of a large, superhuman male who escapes from a medical facility after an experiment goes "horribly" wrong. A priest/scientist works with the police and with their combined efforts they attempt to apprehend the murderous fiend. Yep...that's about it. The same large villain who's featured in Anthropophagus is also the main attraction here. As usual, the dubbing is inconsistent, and at times, sounds like it was recorded in someone's garage. Even the film stock will change quality without a moment's notice...all typical factors to reaffirm my feelings of detestment. D'Amato is without a doubt the WORST Italian horror director I've seen. Of all the times I've discussed how inconsistent Fulci or Argento can be or even how terrible I think Bava is at times, they simply don't match up to the worthlessness of D'Amato's nonexistent directorial skill-set.

What's left to say? It's particularly painful to sit through 90 minutes of this. Some of you may wonder, "Hey, why even sit through it at all? You don't have to!" Yes...but it's all part of my mission and if there wasn't at least one person on the planet that could report back the results of movies like this who else would? Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and fetch my mail...if I'm not back in 5 minutes, assume D'Amato supporters snatched me up and threw me into a white van.
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