1/10
What were they thinking!!!
18 November 2011
I'm sure there's been the occasional viewer that wonders why I do get so angry about movies sometimes. Well, films are something that I'm very passionate about, every movie that I've seen goes from that is praised with comments or hate with every cell of my brain.

And speaking of the literal Devil, we have ourselves "The Nutcracker in 3D"!!!

...This is the worst movie I've ever seen!!!! First of all, Anderi Konchalovsky directed this crap! He previously directed "Runaway Train" and the TV-movie "The Odyssey". I can't accept this!!! How is that possible that he went from a groundbreaking movie and a cult fantasy film to This?!?

What's the point on making a movie with Nazi Rats (They are Mice in the original story, you idiots!!!) that burn toys like how they did to the Jews?!?

OK, if Konchalovsky wanted to make a despotic movie with Nazis represented like greedy rats and other political animal-alike allusions that's OK! It's interesting! ...But leave the classic story of the Nutcracker alone!!!

It would be like... If I make a movie about the tale of Aladdin, where Aladdin is Obama, Jafar is a Bin Laden, Agrabah a New York-alike city destroyed by terrorist attacks and The Genie be an incarnation of Uncle Sam! Oh, and all this weird despotic crap pretended to be a "kids movie". No!No!No!!! That's not how it works!!! I'll describe the two scenes that mostly offended me: the Rat King, after performing a bad-choreographed musical number, kills a shark inside a tank by electrocuting it with a light!!! The second one, the Rat King suddenly rips off the head of a living Drummer Boy with bare hands and for a few seconds he plays volleyball with his Nazi-soldiers using the head of the poor guy and than replace it and act like nothing happened! You know, for KIDS!

But of course, these are the images that comes to your mind when you think of the Nutcracker! ...Nazi creatures that burn toys, kill sharks and play volleyball with the head of their victims HELLO?!?

The movie is an awful waste of money and talent(...If there was ANY!!!), and it sucks balls because for the unappealing Nazi characters, the awful 3D effect and for turning Tchaikovsky's music into horrendous songs that makes "Marry the Mole" look like Bohemian Rhapsody!!!

And I'm not the only person who thinks this "movie" in an abomination: 0% on Rotten Tomatoes! And Roger Ebert said: "The Nutcracker in 3D is one of those rare holiday movies that may send children screaming under their seats." In fact, no kid went to see this movie! The Nutcraker in 3D was a giant NUT-BOMB at the box office!!!

This movie is one of those rare movies that can insult the intelligence of Anybody. Do not watch it.
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