What little plot there is focuses on George Manning (Seymour Cassel), a family man left alone on his birthday, as his wife and children are out of town. A pair of hippies,Donna(Colleen Camp) and Jackson (Sondra Locke) get lost in a rainstorm, and knock on his door to dry off and use a phone. He makes the bad call of having a threesome with these two bits of dried out mutton dressed as lamb, they trash his house and hold him hostage with the threat of an accusation of statutory rape, destroying his previously happy home life.
90 minutes of pointlessness ensues. Here's some lowlights:
That godawful title song about good old dad, repeated at least 4 times over the course of the film. It's as if you hired sub par chipmunks impersonators to sing a particularly maudlin greeting card. The rest of the constant and overly loud music selection isn't much better.
That threesome? It's mostly poorly lit close ups of doughy man ass and elbows. I think I may have seen half a nipple.
Menacing? The talentless twosome think terrifying is throwing food, breaking stuff and cackling like a school Halloween play's witch at ear splitting volume. Ketchup (which we are granted a 2 minute close up of while the crappy cackles are turned up past 11 on the soundtrack) has never been an effective object of menace or atmosphere.
The pseudo lesbianism? Barely explained, fully clothed.
Deaths? A delivery boy meets a barely visible death in a fishbowl.
As an avid lover of exploitation cinema, I can not figure out how this film contains so many of the right elements (nudity,lesbianism, hammy acting, dime store surrealism via an over reliance on green and yellow camera gels) to be a trash camp classic, but is so utterly dull.
Instead, all we get is a bored victim, played by an actor who is obviously counting the money he got paid in his head while filming, and two dizzy birds meaning to come across as a low budget Manson family and succeeding only in acting like the most irritating child in your kindergarten class, all tossed food and screechy baby voices. Toss in some terrible music, enough stock location shots to fill the world's worst tourist brochure for San Francisco and you've almost got the picture of what an utter turd this is.
Thankfully, after a night of non terror and a still alive George, the girls (and this film) are put out of their misery by an errant ASPCA truck.
It isn't scary, it isn't funny and that ending makes NO sense, but at least "Death Game" is finally over.
90 minutes of pointlessness ensues. Here's some lowlights:
That godawful title song about good old dad, repeated at least 4 times over the course of the film. It's as if you hired sub par chipmunks impersonators to sing a particularly maudlin greeting card. The rest of the constant and overly loud music selection isn't much better.
That threesome? It's mostly poorly lit close ups of doughy man ass and elbows. I think I may have seen half a nipple.
Menacing? The talentless twosome think terrifying is throwing food, breaking stuff and cackling like a school Halloween play's witch at ear splitting volume. Ketchup (which we are granted a 2 minute close up of while the crappy cackles are turned up past 11 on the soundtrack) has never been an effective object of menace or atmosphere.
The pseudo lesbianism? Barely explained, fully clothed.
Deaths? A delivery boy meets a barely visible death in a fishbowl.
As an avid lover of exploitation cinema, I can not figure out how this film contains so many of the right elements (nudity,lesbianism, hammy acting, dime store surrealism via an over reliance on green and yellow camera gels) to be a trash camp classic, but is so utterly dull.
Instead, all we get is a bored victim, played by an actor who is obviously counting the money he got paid in his head while filming, and two dizzy birds meaning to come across as a low budget Manson family and succeeding only in acting like the most irritating child in your kindergarten class, all tossed food and screechy baby voices. Toss in some terrible music, enough stock location shots to fill the world's worst tourist brochure for San Francisco and you've almost got the picture of what an utter turd this is.
Thankfully, after a night of non terror and a still alive George, the girls (and this film) are put out of their misery by an errant ASPCA truck.
It isn't scary, it isn't funny and that ending makes NO sense, but at least "Death Game" is finally over.