5/10
Remember when trailers weren't 90 second spoilers?
5 April 2015
Warning: Spoilers
I won't type any spoiler here. Don't worry about that. But, don't bother watching the spoiler--I mean the "trailer"--for this movie. I remember when a trailer for a movie would show you a few short clips, some highlights, a couple of zingers... Now, it just shows you an encapsulated version of the film. First, it's the "set up", then it's the "...but THEN!" followed by the "...and you'll NEVER expect THIS person to kill THIS OTHER person!" closely followed by "...as the suspect is revealed to be THE OTHER GUY'S WIFE! You'll NEVER see that one coming! Or that she's CARRYING HER BEST FRIEND'S BABY!"

Really? I mean, COME ON! The whole premise of a shock rests on the presumption that the person cutting the trailer DOESN'T REVEAL IT IN THE TRAILER!!!

If The Six Sense was released now, in 2015, I'd sort of expect the trailer to reveal that Malcolm was dead all along. Or, if Silence of the Lambs had a 2015 trailer, it would include shots of Jodi Foster standing over Ted Levine's body, and Brook Smith sitting outside his house with a blanket wrapped around her, telling the EMTs how she was certain she was going to die.

WHERE WOULD IT END? Would Old Yeller's trailer show him getting shot? How about a trailer for the original Rocky, where the judges actually reveal their scores?

It's a combination of laziness on the part of the idiots cutting the trailers, and the collective impatience of the average potential viewer who's so used to looking up facts on their smart phone they've lost the ability to "wait and find out what happens".

I've heard JJ Abrams complain about this, but I haven't heard about anyone making an attempt to stop the film studios from doing it. Frankly, I no longer watch trailers, if I can help it. I'm tired of them spoiling movies that COST MONEY TO SEE!
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