Toy Soldiers (1991)
6/10
School Hard
28 August 2015
I remember seeing TV spots for Toy Soldiers in October 1991. I had recently seen The Goonies and I was surprised at how much Sean Astin had matured since then. It made me wonder how I would look once I stopped being a child. I didn't actually see the film until now (the 15 certificate meant I could not see it at the cinema and I just never got around to renting it later) but I seem to associate it first with that particular memory.

I was expecting it to be an action comedy, something along the lines of Home Alone meets Die Hard. How wrong I was. Toy Soldiers is surprisingly grim and serious. Directed and co-written by Beverly Hills Cop creator Daniel Petrie Jnr the film features a lot of well shot and staged action. The opening scene in particular has a memorable freefall stunt and there are innumerable blood squibs aplenty (a dying art in an age of awful CGI blood effects).

Billy Tepper and his gang of misfit Rejects draw the ire of Dean Parker at their prestigious boarding school, but he refuses to expel any of them as he sees their potential and wants to make real men of them. One of the kids is taken away by the FBI for protection when a terrorist group attempts to put pressure on his dad. Said terrorists promptly take over the school and are dismayed that their target has vanished. Instead they make do with the crop of students that they have and begin making demands. Billy and his gang do not take well to this plot and plan to strike back using whatever limited resources they have at their disposal.

It's here that Toy Soldiers sort of disappoints me. Instead of taking place in a concise time-frame it drags on for a few days and nights and features low-octane plotting for the most part. It would have been much more exciting if the gang were efficient and ready for action instead of fighting back with trickery and subterfuge. I guess it does ultimately work and hang together but the suspense could have been ramped up significantly further.

There is a great supporting cast featuring Louis Gossett Jnr, Denholm Elliot, Jerry Orbach, R. Lee Ermey, and the terrific Andrew Divoff who doesn't get as much recognition for his many bad guy performances. The movie also features a lot scenes with the boys hanging around in their Y-fronts. I am not sure to whom the director was trying to appeal with this but it feels very unnecessary.

There's not much surprise in the fact that it's fallen out of popularity and become a cult movie. Toy Soldiers had a high concept but is too low-key for it's own good. Certainly a good movie to discover but not as good as it should have been.
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