And if you think that sounds bad, wait until you try and make sense of the 'plot'.
The main star of the film is someone you've probably never heard of, and he gets shot by Matthias Hues and Shang Tsung from Mortal Kombat.
Then we flash forward however long it is, and now he's working with Casper Van Dien as private investigators.
To cut a long story short, Tia Carrere is married to Mark Dacascos, they are on holiday, for some reason Matthias Hues and Shang kill him, so she goes to them so they can capture them.
The film is totally incoherent, and unfortunately, an uneventful mess. It's clear from the beginning that this was someone's dream project, and after the success of The Expendables, why not get the best of the straight to Video action stars of the early 1990's?
Well they do, but only in the final third, when Dacascos (who directed this) decides to turn the final act into a rip off of the rescue mission in Predator.
It's all lethargically done, the action is below par, and despite having all these martial artists involved, the action sequences are really poorly done, and the CGI explosions are laughable.
What should have been a big slice of nostalgia, turns into nothing but a chore to get through.
And it's really only worth watching to see just how out favourite C-list action stars of yesteryear have changed.
And for at least three of them, the years have not been kind.
You'll be desperate to see Wayne's World after this....
The main star of the film is someone you've probably never heard of, and he gets shot by Matthias Hues and Shang Tsung from Mortal Kombat.
Then we flash forward however long it is, and now he's working with Casper Van Dien as private investigators.
To cut a long story short, Tia Carrere is married to Mark Dacascos, they are on holiday, for some reason Matthias Hues and Shang kill him, so she goes to them so they can capture them.
The film is totally incoherent, and unfortunately, an uneventful mess. It's clear from the beginning that this was someone's dream project, and after the success of The Expendables, why not get the best of the straight to Video action stars of the early 1990's?
Well they do, but only in the final third, when Dacascos (who directed this) decides to turn the final act into a rip off of the rescue mission in Predator.
It's all lethargically done, the action is below par, and despite having all these martial artists involved, the action sequences are really poorly done, and the CGI explosions are laughable.
What should have been a big slice of nostalgia, turns into nothing but a chore to get through.
And it's really only worth watching to see just how out favourite C-list action stars of yesteryear have changed.
And for at least three of them, the years have not been kind.
You'll be desperate to see Wayne's World after this....