1/10
I Take This Woman - You Can Have Her!
14 January 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Just because a film is old and has two up-an-coming Hollywood legends, doesn't mean it's a good classic film.

I had high expectations when I sat down to watch "I Take This Woman" (1931) -- it didn't take long into the film to see that my expectations would not be met.

Firstly, the script is so poorly written that the actors didn't have a chance at acting. It appears that even they were pained to speak such melodramatic dribble. The lines are so short and choppy that they make the actors appear robotic and one-dimensional.

The legendary Carole Lombard and Gary Cooper are certainly young and attractive in the film, but obviously neither had found his or her famous stride yet -- Lombard's comedic genius, and Cooper's boy-howdy charm.

I realize that this film was made in the early years of cinema, but the camera shots are terrible -- "Walk in front of the camera, please -- it's a take." In the scene at the circus, it's obvious that the "crowds" are painted back drops, kept in the dark, but still obvious.

The sappy storyline almost borders on comedy because it's so clumsily contrived. Here's the formula: Rich, spoiled girl + handsome ranch hand (he's beneath her station, of course) + marriage + conflict + convoluted tragic circumstances = happily ever after. It's that simple and flat. (Incidentally, Cooper would appear in a similar film in 1938, "The Lady and the Cowboy" -- a much more palatable film.)

This film has the overall presentation of a B movie (make that a D). It surprises me that the two stars went any further in their careers after this stinker. I usually enjoy watching Lombard and Cooper, but this one hurt to behold.
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