Very possibly the worst anthology horror film I'd come across until now. It consists of contributions from various countries. About as international as the United Nations - and just as effective and useful.
The 1st story "Sinful Women of Hollfall" is very well shot, full of colour, original, interesting - but then that baffling ending... I have no idea what it means, absolutely no clue. It'd be silly to even venture a guess: some random BS intended as a substitute for a proper conclusion.
Two Austrian girls from the 18th or 19th century get lesbian with each other, which results in a demon that acts as Sin Police starting to punish the "seduced one" (we don't find out whether the pregnant seductress is getting punished by Trud the demon too, which by all logic should be the case, yet the story pretty much ignores the blonde). There's also that weird scene when the seductress (the pregnant blonde) smashes her face in with a rock... twice, for no apparent reason. With no noticeable injuries, which is preposterous. But I was willing to let it slide, provided the rest made sense. It didn't... 5/10.
"The Childbirth Djinn" is some Turkish nonsense. I always stay away from movies from that part of the world, and this just confirms my decision. I hope that poor goat wasn't really killed, for the movie, otherwise a heavy curse (doesn't have to be a djinn, anything demonic) would be in order for the director. 2/10
"The Kindler & the Virgin" is a lousy Polish story. If one can even refer to this mess as a story. More like several scenes thrown together on a pile. Fortunately, it's the shortest one at just 10 minutes. So far EVERYTHING I'd come across from Polish cinema has been garbage. 1/10
"Beware the Melonheads" should be "Beware of Dumb Kids and Their Even Dumber Millennial Parents." The kid meets a faceless older boy in the woods, yet fails to report this meeting to his parents right away. That was already strike 1 against this crap. Then the silly peeing incident. Strike 2. Then Strike 3: the"imaginary friend" malarkey, a cheesy plot-device to turn the boy's testimony null-and-void "because hey he's a boy and all children make up everything". Now, after 3 strikes the story should have been abandoned, right? Well, I am forgiving, especially since this is the American entry hence I knew it'd be very dumb hence my very low expectations. Strike 4: the 6 year-old boy says that William is "a little boy like me" when in fact William the Cannibal is clearly an older teen. At this point I was rooting for the cannibals, to have a nice meal: a family of three (dumb Americans). Strike 5: the Melonheads are more like aliens (Coneheads) than cannibal degenerates with "large heads". Laughable. Strike 6: the guy doesn't hear his wife's incredibly piercing scream. He couldn't have been more than 10 meters away, and in a quiet forest environment. I shall spare you the other 11 strikes which involve horrific acting, ridiculous make-up, idiotic dialogue and a stupid predictable "twist"... 0/10.
"Panagas the Pagan" is the 1st time I've ever watched any Greek stuff, and judging from this drivel I'm going to always give a wide berth around anything filmo-Greekish. On a side-note, isn't Greek supposed to sound like Spanish? Sounded more like Finnish. 1/10
"The Palace of Horrors" is cheap-looking B-nonsense not helped by being shot in b&w. The Indian entry, rather boring. 2/10
"A Nocturnal Breath" is the German entry. Finally something watchable after a string of stinkers. The only scary thing about this non-scary anthology is that Germans and Austrians win this "competition" hands down, despite both nations being infamous for their very mediocre cinema. 5/10.
"Cobbler's Lot" is "artsy" and presented in a silent-film way, but is better than most of the other crap here. Still, I'll never understand why the princess killed herself before the arrival of her spy-bird. Why send a bird to find out what happens at the lake when you can't even bother to wait for its report? The Hungarian entry. Good soundtrack. 4/10.
The 1st story "Sinful Women of Hollfall" is very well shot, full of colour, original, interesting - but then that baffling ending... I have no idea what it means, absolutely no clue. It'd be silly to even venture a guess: some random BS intended as a substitute for a proper conclusion.
Two Austrian girls from the 18th or 19th century get lesbian with each other, which results in a demon that acts as Sin Police starting to punish the "seduced one" (we don't find out whether the pregnant seductress is getting punished by Trud the demon too, which by all logic should be the case, yet the story pretty much ignores the blonde). There's also that weird scene when the seductress (the pregnant blonde) smashes her face in with a rock... twice, for no apparent reason. With no noticeable injuries, which is preposterous. But I was willing to let it slide, provided the rest made sense. It didn't... 5/10.
"The Childbirth Djinn" is some Turkish nonsense. I always stay away from movies from that part of the world, and this just confirms my decision. I hope that poor goat wasn't really killed, for the movie, otherwise a heavy curse (doesn't have to be a djinn, anything demonic) would be in order for the director. 2/10
"The Kindler & the Virgin" is a lousy Polish story. If one can even refer to this mess as a story. More like several scenes thrown together on a pile. Fortunately, it's the shortest one at just 10 minutes. So far EVERYTHING I'd come across from Polish cinema has been garbage. 1/10
"Beware the Melonheads" should be "Beware of Dumb Kids and Their Even Dumber Millennial Parents." The kid meets a faceless older boy in the woods, yet fails to report this meeting to his parents right away. That was already strike 1 against this crap. Then the silly peeing incident. Strike 2. Then Strike 3: the"imaginary friend" malarkey, a cheesy plot-device to turn the boy's testimony null-and-void "because hey he's a boy and all children make up everything". Now, after 3 strikes the story should have been abandoned, right? Well, I am forgiving, especially since this is the American entry hence I knew it'd be very dumb hence my very low expectations. Strike 4: the 6 year-old boy says that William is "a little boy like me" when in fact William the Cannibal is clearly an older teen. At this point I was rooting for the cannibals, to have a nice meal: a family of three (dumb Americans). Strike 5: the Melonheads are more like aliens (Coneheads) than cannibal degenerates with "large heads". Laughable. Strike 6: the guy doesn't hear his wife's incredibly piercing scream. He couldn't have been more than 10 meters away, and in a quiet forest environment. I shall spare you the other 11 strikes which involve horrific acting, ridiculous make-up, idiotic dialogue and a stupid predictable "twist"... 0/10.
"Panagas the Pagan" is the 1st time I've ever watched any Greek stuff, and judging from this drivel I'm going to always give a wide berth around anything filmo-Greekish. On a side-note, isn't Greek supposed to sound like Spanish? Sounded more like Finnish. 1/10
"The Palace of Horrors" is cheap-looking B-nonsense not helped by being shot in b&w. The Indian entry, rather boring. 2/10
"A Nocturnal Breath" is the German entry. Finally something watchable after a string of stinkers. The only scary thing about this non-scary anthology is that Germans and Austrians win this "competition" hands down, despite both nations being infamous for their very mediocre cinema. 5/10.
"Cobbler's Lot" is "artsy" and presented in a silent-film way, but is better than most of the other crap here. Still, I'll never understand why the princess killed herself before the arrival of her spy-bird. Why send a bird to find out what happens at the lake when you can't even bother to wait for its report? The Hungarian entry. Good soundtrack. 4/10.