6/10
Story is a mess but it's a gorgeous looking film
31 August 2023
The Haunting Of The Queen Mary is a bizarrely grandiose, intensely eccentric, grand old horror spectacle that unfolds in two timelines about a hundred years apart and while I have to say that it's not much of a coherent beast in terms of storyline, it's one of the most visually stylish, atmospherically engaging films I've seen this year. In 1938 the Queen Mary steamship makes a special, no expenses spared Halloween voyage across the Atlantic and one ill fated family of carny stowaways has an increasingly dangerous encounter with... something supernatural. In present day a young woman (Alice Eve) tours the now dormant ship and tries to convince the slightly shady duty captain to let her include footage of it in her upcoming podcast but it soon becomes clear that the supernatural element might be still hanging around. Well, not that clear but that's the best I can surmise it. I'll be totally honest with you: the writer and editor of this thing may have had a few too many while working on this because the plot just... careens around wildly making not much sense, the transitions from time period are loose and undefined and the core elements of the story are buried in pacing pandemonium. Having said that, the director and cinematographer seem to have had just the right amount because this is one of the most beautiful looking horror pictures I've seen in some time, an opulently lit, complexly structured palette full of striking costume choices, clanking steampunk viscera below deck and some of the most flat-out gruesome murder scenes committed to celluloid involving an axe swung just about as furiously as possible into people's faces. The 1938 sequences are breathtaking in period detail, dialogue and song/dance numbers as the ship hosts celebrities like Fred Astaire himself, among others. This is a big, loud, immersive and hectic experience that's reminiscent of the early 2000's Dark Castle horror films like Thirteen Ghosts, Ghost Ship, Gothika and House On Haunted Hill. These type of films are absolutely dripping in the style, production design and visual artistic aspects even if story and logic don't quite fall into step. That's a great way to describe this one, a big ol' ghost story you just sort of surrender to like a runaway theme park ride, it's so much fun.
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