"Die Braut meines Freundes", which means "My Friend's Bride", is a German television film from 2001, so this one will have its tenth anniversary less than two months from now and most likely it happened already because chances are low you will read this review of mine just days after I posted it. Anyway, as for the basics, this is a 1.5-hour movie, slightly shorter and this is the usual running time for the vast majority of small screen releases from my country. The director is Gabi Kubach. She started making movies in 2970 already according to imdb, so highly experienced director and very rarely she also came up with the screenplays for her works. Not in this case, but we will get to that later. Kubach has been retired for a decade now already and that is a good thing because she is really the epitome of quantity over quality. One really weak project after the next, especially between 1990 and 2010, her most prolific years. No surprise this abysmal movie we got here is also from that era exactly. A bit sad too if a filmmaker this prolific never gets beyond the level of ARD Degeto quality-wise. Examples follow later on. The writer is Christiane Sadlo. She is a decade younger than Kubach, but apparently also retired for over a decade now already and in her case, it is an even better thing. No matter which dark corner of German television quality we are looking for, she has been a part of it. Pilcher? Check. Danella? Check. Lindström? Check. In aller Freundschaft? Check. Unreal. For Inga Lindström adaptations (gigantic stupid schmaltz with zero creativity or authenticity) she has been in charge of screenplays on almost 70 occasions, mayb even more in case imdb is not 100% accurate with the number. Still an unreal figure. I think this alone classifies her as a contender for worst German movie writer of all time. That may sound a bit harsh, but it's accurate. And besides, these movies (and people) are financed through money that German citizens are forced to pay regardless of if they care one but about this kinda stuff or watch it. But now, let's stop being this general and instead go abck to this film here. The age makes it obvious that you will not find too many highly familiar names in the cast list here anymore, even if you are a German film buff like myself. The (male) lead is Michael von Au. I have come across him in other movies like this. He does not seem to have a lot of range or versatility, but his blonde hair and solid physical stature help him in scoring these roles. I mean obviously he plays a character that not even the most talented actors could have turned into a credible performance with how he was written, but then again nobody forced him to accept the part. His female co-lead is Swiss actress Katharina Böhm. Gotta admit with her I am even less familiar. She is the daughter of Karlheinz Böhm I see. That is really all I can say and that she is milsly attractive, even to me as somebody who is not into blondes. As for the supporting cast, Fitz and Trowe are no strangers either, but with Fitz I know that his body of work includes many films like this one here and is also nothing to be really proud of.
Now as for the film itself, it already starts pretty messy with the scene with the male protagonist is stopped by the police and this scene alone showed you that you cannot take this movie seriously whatsoever although it wants to be taken seriously. Be it the cops rambling on about holiday destinations or the one cop bumping into the other at the end of the scene, it's all a mess and as unfunny as it gets in a most cringeworthy manner. And as if this was not bad enough already, we find out a little later that the female protagonist is also with the police. And knows the two guys from early on. Small, small world. The scene in which she and her future sweetheart (von Au) meet for the first time is as bad as it gets too with the words we hear and then the visual explanation that she is just trying to get a helpless animal off a tree. They fall for each other, but things get more complicated quickly because she is, as you can read in the title, the man's friend's partner. So she is not single. This is where the film also delivers again from the sexism perspective. Anti-male tendencies are a huge thing in these movies. Because they are mostly for female audiences and I applaud every female who does not fall for these travesties, but see right through them as I do. So yeah, what i mean with that is that when a woman cheats on a guy, it is because the other guy did not take enough care of her and because the new fella is the love of her life. Obviously. It's just fate. If it happens the other way around, which it does a lot in these movies, then the male is disgraceful, disgusting and just a pig you could say. No coincidence that here they need to indicate that the other man may have an affair with a colleague and that is somewhat justification for the two lead characters ending up together. Another plot involves an elderly lady close to the female protagonist. She is pretty sick apparently, but still does what she wants and not really what the doctors tell her. This also includes the male protagonist because he is a doctor himself (of course!). He was basically living for his job, but until he found Böhm's character he never thought about settling with a woman, but she changes that in him obviously. Problem is she is about to be married to the buddy. Of course. They are goinng all in here. Not just dating him, but right before marriages. But hey, he treu love between the two leads can overcome that as well, especially with how well doc takes care of the elderly lady. What else is there to say? Oh yes, they are using some pretty famous songs in this film, especially early on. I think one was Cranberries? Don't remember 100% anymore. But not even these quality songs can hide how shallow and unauthentic and generic this movie is overall. I mentioned already that they are close to the wedding already. Guess what, they are not even shameless enough to show us the two at the altar when our hero enters the place in an almost angelic manner and stands there to confess his love to the bride and of course she runs away with him. Right from the altar. Sigh. I think this says it all about this movie. I wonder how many times in the last ten (or even hundred) years people really ran the second they are about to be married. It happens so often in films. You know a movie almost always sucks if it has such an inclusion. Drama and emotion for the sake of it with zero credibility. Oh yes,, another thing I need to mention that surprised me a but was that there even was an erotic component to this film. This is actually something you don't see too often with these movies. Like when we have the female protagonist topless in the bathroom and nothing is hidden there. Same a little later after she makes out with the guy, we see her breasts again. Unusual for German afternoon television. Normally they keep it as harmless as they can and avoid shots like these. Okay, I shall stop now, way too much already anyway although they are more moment that deserve being mentioned because of how bad they are. The best example is the older guy with the mustache who knows exactly what is happening for some strange reason because he is never really there to understand why he knows. Or of course, in the sense of the most exaggerated and artificial happy ending, our beloved doc does not only get the girl, but also gets his promotion in the end. Terrible movie. Highly not recommended.
Now as for the film itself, it already starts pretty messy with the scene with the male protagonist is stopped by the police and this scene alone showed you that you cannot take this movie seriously whatsoever although it wants to be taken seriously. Be it the cops rambling on about holiday destinations or the one cop bumping into the other at the end of the scene, it's all a mess and as unfunny as it gets in a most cringeworthy manner. And as if this was not bad enough already, we find out a little later that the female protagonist is also with the police. And knows the two guys from early on. Small, small world. The scene in which she and her future sweetheart (von Au) meet for the first time is as bad as it gets too with the words we hear and then the visual explanation that she is just trying to get a helpless animal off a tree. They fall for each other, but things get more complicated quickly because she is, as you can read in the title, the man's friend's partner. So she is not single. This is where the film also delivers again from the sexism perspective. Anti-male tendencies are a huge thing in these movies. Because they are mostly for female audiences and I applaud every female who does not fall for these travesties, but see right through them as I do. So yeah, what i mean with that is that when a woman cheats on a guy, it is because the other guy did not take enough care of her and because the new fella is the love of her life. Obviously. It's just fate. If it happens the other way around, which it does a lot in these movies, then the male is disgraceful, disgusting and just a pig you could say. No coincidence that here they need to indicate that the other man may have an affair with a colleague and that is somewhat justification for the two lead characters ending up together. Another plot involves an elderly lady close to the female protagonist. She is pretty sick apparently, but still does what she wants and not really what the doctors tell her. This also includes the male protagonist because he is a doctor himself (of course!). He was basically living for his job, but until he found Böhm's character he never thought about settling with a woman, but she changes that in him obviously. Problem is she is about to be married to the buddy. Of course. They are goinng all in here. Not just dating him, but right before marriages. But hey, he treu love between the two leads can overcome that as well, especially with how well doc takes care of the elderly lady. What else is there to say? Oh yes, they are using some pretty famous songs in this film, especially early on. I think one was Cranberries? Don't remember 100% anymore. But not even these quality songs can hide how shallow and unauthentic and generic this movie is overall. I mentioned already that they are close to the wedding already. Guess what, they are not even shameless enough to show us the two at the altar when our hero enters the place in an almost angelic manner and stands there to confess his love to the bride and of course she runs away with him. Right from the altar. Sigh. I think this says it all about this movie. I wonder how many times in the last ten (or even hundred) years people really ran the second they are about to be married. It happens so often in films. You know a movie almost always sucks if it has such an inclusion. Drama and emotion for the sake of it with zero credibility. Oh yes,, another thing I need to mention that surprised me a but was that there even was an erotic component to this film. This is actually something you don't see too often with these movies. Like when we have the female protagonist topless in the bathroom and nothing is hidden there. Same a little later after she makes out with the guy, we see her breasts again. Unusual for German afternoon television. Normally they keep it as harmless as they can and avoid shots like these. Okay, I shall stop now, way too much already anyway although they are more moment that deserve being mentioned because of how bad they are. The best example is the older guy with the mustache who knows exactly what is happening for some strange reason because he is never really there to understand why he knows. Or of course, in the sense of the most exaggerated and artificial happy ending, our beloved doc does not only get the girl, but also gets his promotion in the end. Terrible movie. Highly not recommended.
