Alfred Hitchcock Presents (TV Series)

Miss Bracegirdle Does Her Duty (1958)

Alfred Hitchcock: Self - Host

Quotes 

• [introduction] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : [Hitchcock is in a film studio set up with lights and cameras; he is standing with his hands on the back of a director's chair marked, "Mr. Hitchcock"]  Good evening.

  [some thing falls off-screen and Hitchcock looks to his left, then turns back and nods in that direction] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : That sound you just heard was made by a guillotine. I brought it home from a recent trip to France. We just can't make them the way the French do.

  [sound of the guillotine off-screen, Hitchcock glances, and nods again] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : A motion picture company borrowed it to use on the adjoining sound stage. They are shooting a picture about the tragedy of a rich middle-aged roue who falls hopelessly in love with a woman old enough to be his wife.

  [shrugs] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : Of course, they are not using the guillotine in the picture. They just happen to have a leading man who's very vain and exceedingly short. Every one of the actresses who reported this morning was about a head too tall.

  [sound of the guillotine off-screen, Hitchcock glances, and nods again] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : We have no such problem. The leading character in our picture is an English spinster. You shall meet her in a moment.

  [Hitchcock approaches the camera and sits down in the director's chair] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : Many of our finest motion pictures are made from bestsellers. Here is one made about a bestseller.

• [afterword] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : [Hitchcock is lounging in his director's chair with the camera at a low angle]  That concludes the life and loves of the intrepid Miss Millicent Bracegirdle. As for Monsieur Boldou, the corpse in the story, he was buried in accordance with his last request. He was cut in pieces, placed in two barrels, and thrown into the river.

  [nods to his left] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : There's been a development next door. The extras have rebelled and overthrown the star.

  [sound of drums rising to a crescendo, then the guillotine falls] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : There he goes now. I'm afraid he's through being tall in the saddle.

  [shifts in his chair] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : And I'm through being wide on the screen. So until next time, good night.