Frasier (TV Series)
The Three Faces of Frasier (2000)
John Mahoney: Martin Crane
Quotes
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Dr. Frasier Crane : Well, suffice it to say, the entire Crane family is now banned from Stefano's.
Martin Crane : Just because of that dumb picture?
Dr. Frasier Crane : No, no, actually, there was a little incident involving Niles, too. He was doing just fine until Stefano took him in some sort of a bear hug and shook him a little too vigorously.
Martin Crane : On the shoes again?
Dr. Frasier Crane : No, this time there was a conveniently-placed lobster tank.
Martin Crane : Poor Niles.
Dr. Frasier Crane : Yeah, it wasn't any picnic for the lobsters either.
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Dr. Frasier Crane : What the hell is wrong with me, Dad? You know, I got so obsessed with that damn picture I completely lost my head!
Martin Crane : Well, I think I know what's really going on here.
Dr. Frasier Crane : Really? Well, enlighten us.
Martin Crane : Well, I think there's some stuff in your life that you can't control: the doctor tells you you're getting old, your ratings are low, you're not happy with your love life. And so I think you obsessed about this picture because you figured it was something in your life that you could control.
[pause]
Dr. Frasier Crane : Well, Dad, you do raise a point.
[Martin looks at him expectantly]
Dr. Frasier Crane : Oh, what the hell, you're dead on. Where did you learn so much about psychology?
Martin Crane : Oh, I listen to radio.
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Martin Crane : So they gave you a big forehead. It makes you look smart.
Dr. Frasier Crane : It makes me look like I discovered fire!
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Daphne Moon : [to Martin, who has just entered the living room] Oh, don't you look nice.
Martin Crane : Yeah, Frasier wanted me dressed up for this mystery lunch of his.
Daphne Moon : He hasn't told you what the occasion is either?
Martin Crane : No, but I'm sure it's something very important. I'm sure he wants to unveil his new antique Elizabethan egg timer.
Daphne Moon : [laughs] Or debut his pre-Columbian spoon rest.
