Superman: The Animated Series (TV Series)

The Main Man: Part I (1996)

Sherman Howard: Preserver

Quotes 

• Lobo : Adios, Wrinkles. You want any more rare dorks snagged, you got my number.

  Preserver : Actually, there is one other being I need for my collection: the last Czarnian.

  Lobo : Ha! That's rich! I'm the last Czarnian.

  [to Superman] 

  Lobo : I fragged the rest of the planet for my high school science project. Gave myself an "A."

• Preserver : Behold. Gathered here are the rarest creatures in the universe, each the last survivor of its race.

  Lobo : So you got a thing for varmints. So what?

  Preserver : Many years ago, the planet Krypton was destroyed. I had long believed all members of the Kryptonian race were extinct, until I found evidence of one living on a distant world called Earth.

  Lobo : [seeing a hologram of Superman]  Looks like a first-class wimp to me.

  Preserver : He is more than he appears.

  Lobo : Sluggo, I got better ways to waste my time than rounding up bugs for your flea circus. So, if you'll hand over the runt, I'll cancel the homemade colostomy I'm planning to inflict on your tiny, wrinkled...

  [a trunk full of jewels appears] 

  Lobo : ...ah! Oh, mama! That's a lot of mai tais. Hoo-ah!

  Preserver : You deliver the last Kryptonian, and the jewels are yours. Do we have a bargain?

  Lobo : Hose down a cage, boss. You're getting a new monkey.

• Superman : This can't be. Krypton?

  Preserver : No, but an incredible simulation.

  Superman : Let me guess. You're the one who hired Lobo to get me.

  Preserver : I do what I must to preserve species threatened with extinction. You are the last Kryptonian. Therefore, your place is here.

  Superman : I think not.

  [punching the glass and recoiling his hand in pain] 

  Superman : Ohhh!

  Preserver : [indicating the red light above his head]  Like Krypton's red sun, this light cancels the unnatural abilities given to you by the yellow sun of Earth. I always strive for complete accuracy.

  Superman : [sarcastic]  Swell.

• Preserver : You are Lobo: assassin, brigand, sociopath, monster.

  Lobo : [spitting]  You left out "scourge of the cosmos."

  Preserver : And the most ruthless bounty hunter in the galaxy. I want to hire you.

  Lobo : Sorry, dude. I'm already on a job.

  [the spittoon containing Sqweek disappears] 

  Lobo : Hey!

  Preserver : Your prisoner will be held until you return. Besides, this job should be no great task to one with your skills.