I decided to pose myself the challenge of finding good things to say about this quality-challenged film.
1. The Obnoxious Young People Having A Drug-Fueled Bacchanal montage is mercifully brief.
2. Heather dies first, and within 10 minutes of the start. This improves the film enormously thenceforth.
3. They burn her animal-print dress. It's an example more people should follow.
4. It's nice to know that stuntmen keep themselves busy with projects like this between real jobs, giving themselves the opportunity to practice talking out loud, which clearly they need desperately.
5. When they decide to bury their friend's body and burn all the related evidence of her death, they also mark her grave with a big cross strewn with her jewelry, which is sweetly sentimental, if not conducive to covering up the murder.
6. The Luring Everyone Back to the Scene of Their Crime starts before even 13 minutes have elapsed so... points for efficiency.
7. If these characters can get into "uni" (which I think means "college") even though they are clearly 30 and shockingly dense, then this is a very hopeful movie, indeed.
8. This movie can currently be watched only as free-view, meaning there a plenty of commercials to give you a break from its effects.
9. There's an egg hunt with all of them running around finding rhyming Riddler-clues like they are the Scooby Gang. That's fun.
10. It's nice to know that if I invited a bunch of people to a country weekend to pick them off one by one, none of them will think to inquire who rented the house they are staying at. I found that very comforting.
11. You learn that you can take plus-ones to a woodsy weekend where your murder victim has invited all your co-conspirators to meet their comeuppance. AND they can bring their sparkly formal evening dresses. Who knew?
12. It's got a Rashomon sequence. And who doesn't enjoy those?
13. "I think I'd know whether or not I was a virgin, NEIL." is truly one of cinema's most authoritative comebacks.
14. It's comforting to know that no matter how unpleasant a person you are, you will still have enough friends to go on a retreat in the woods with you, and cover up your murder, if necessary.
15. They really do work the holiday theme. Lots of cute Easter decorations (that spell out MURDERER).
16. Nobody other than Heather dies for A VERY LONG TIME so you have lots of time to get to know the other characters (without suspecting any of them, because obviously not of them are smart enough to pull the whole set up off, or even spell "MURDERER").
17. If you are a fan of the Sims 4, this movie is the closest you can get to watching the in-game horror film "Midnight Massacre III", just like the Sims do.
18. Learning that if you need to pour boiling chocolate on someone's face from one story up they will just stand there and take it is very empowering for a viewer.
19. No snide joke here: there is one kill that is ... QUITE sudden and unpredictable. That was a pleasant surprise.
20. There's a gay character; that's good, that's modern. But that's A Secret That Must Be Kept; that's neither good, nor modern.
21. BONUS: I didn't even have to watch a full hour of the film to come up with 20 things!!!
1. The Obnoxious Young People Having A Drug-Fueled Bacchanal montage is mercifully brief.
2. Heather dies first, and within 10 minutes of the start. This improves the film enormously thenceforth.
3. They burn her animal-print dress. It's an example more people should follow.
4. It's nice to know that stuntmen keep themselves busy with projects like this between real jobs, giving themselves the opportunity to practice talking out loud, which clearly they need desperately.
5. When they decide to bury their friend's body and burn all the related evidence of her death, they also mark her grave with a big cross strewn with her jewelry, which is sweetly sentimental, if not conducive to covering up the murder.
6. The Luring Everyone Back to the Scene of Their Crime starts before even 13 minutes have elapsed so... points for efficiency.
7. If these characters can get into "uni" (which I think means "college") even though they are clearly 30 and shockingly dense, then this is a very hopeful movie, indeed.
8. This movie can currently be watched only as free-view, meaning there a plenty of commercials to give you a break from its effects.
9. There's an egg hunt with all of them running around finding rhyming Riddler-clues like they are the Scooby Gang. That's fun.
10. It's nice to know that if I invited a bunch of people to a country weekend to pick them off one by one, none of them will think to inquire who rented the house they are staying at. I found that very comforting.
11. You learn that you can take plus-ones to a woodsy weekend where your murder victim has invited all your co-conspirators to meet their comeuppance. AND they can bring their sparkly formal evening dresses. Who knew?
12. It's got a Rashomon sequence. And who doesn't enjoy those?
13. "I think I'd know whether or not I was a virgin, NEIL." is truly one of cinema's most authoritative comebacks.
14. It's comforting to know that no matter how unpleasant a person you are, you will still have enough friends to go on a retreat in the woods with you, and cover up your murder, if necessary.
15. They really do work the holiday theme. Lots of cute Easter decorations (that spell out MURDERER).
16. Nobody other than Heather dies for A VERY LONG TIME so you have lots of time to get to know the other characters (without suspecting any of them, because obviously not of them are smart enough to pull the whole set up off, or even spell "MURDERER").
17. If you are a fan of the Sims 4, this movie is the closest you can get to watching the in-game horror film "Midnight Massacre III", just like the Sims do.
18. Learning that if you need to pour boiling chocolate on someone's face from one story up they will just stand there and take it is very empowering for a viewer.
19. No snide joke here: there is one kill that is ... QUITE sudden and unpredictable. That was a pleasant surprise.
20. There's a gay character; that's good, that's modern. But that's A Secret That Must Be Kept; that's neither good, nor modern.
21. BONUS: I didn't even have to watch a full hour of the film to come up with 20 things!!!