User Reviews

Hot on the heels of Camillo Teti's flummoxing 'Titanic: The legend goes on,' it wasn't enough for Orlando Corradi to create his own animated Titanic flick, 'The legend of the Titanic,' for he added terrible insult to grievous injury a few years later with the bewildering 'In search of the Titanic.' And still this was apparently not enough, for here comes Corradi following up his dubious full-length films with a television series that continues the saga. I thought I knew and was prepared for how awful 2010's 'Fantasy Island' was going to be, but either I blocked out my memories of the preceding movies to spare myself the pain, or everything about them that was already so questionable managed to get even worse in the intervening six years. Let's not pull punches: this one season of Italian children's TV is so ghastly that I'm fairly certain I could feel the cells in my body dying as I watched, and specifically for that reason.

I was prepared to say that there are a couple facets of this series that aren't completely rotten. Yet within even only the first two episodes I changed my mind, and the fact of the matter is that I believe the one thing in these several episodes that deserves any steady modicum of respect is the music. It tends to be repetitive and bland, exactly the type of themes that would be commissioned for a generic, low-grade animated adventure series, but in the very least it doesn't make my ears bleed - and at its best it's actually pretty swell. Unfortunately, this is the most consistently kind I can be in speaking of 'Fantasy Island.' Granted, it's also the case that the painted backgrounds commonly bear some nice detail, and some of the computer-generated imagery of some other environments, especially those underwater. On the other hand, some settings are oddly bereft of any detail or texture. There are also too many instances when these backgrounds and environments, particularly the CGI, are utilized in a manner that gauchely emphasizes the artificiality. And not least as these often clash with the active animated elements. If the best that can be said of the visuals is so-so representation of the setting, something is horribly wrong.

Beyond these aspects the series only ever gets worse. Characters and other active animated elements are usually realized with unnatural movement that is unsettling in and of itself, and somehow the fact that it is so rapid and fluid makes it more nightmarish. Nevermind that non-human characters are anthropomorphized; just wait until you get a glimpse of non-human characters, including those with fins, being given human limbs, and mouth animation straight out of Cronenbergian body horror. Why, even the designs of some human characters are decidedly unnerving. Some bits of the animation are just confusing or nonsensical as they present, including semi-regular head-bobbing that recalls the idle animations of videogames; no few other odds and ends make me cringe with a severe reaction that exists somewhere on the spectrum between astonishment and disgust. There are times when the animation is so hideous that one is perhaps reminded of the ironically godawful work seen in some modern adult animation, like on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim programming block, where part of the joke is in the outward witlessness of the visuals.

I trust that the dialogue of the English dub corresponds as closely as possible to the original Italian script, but one way or another the dialogue is mostly just horrid, simple, and dull - and like the rest of the writing including the humor, mostly senseless, and insulting to the intelligence of even the youngest viewers. The character writing reliably raises a quizzical eyebrow, as roundly atrocious for new characters as for those who return from the pictures. The scene writing is a garbled, baffling mess, and often self-contradicting. I suppose one might argue that there is at least some semblance of cohesiveness to the narrative at some times, yet all told the show does such a poor job of communicating that narrative in terms of pacing, tone, sequencing, or plot development that one should well be equally dismissive of the story. That's where the storytelling isn't bizarrely unsophisticated to a degree far exceeding the norm of any children's fare; the "plot" is often so light and fluffy that it seems too much to say there is any substance here. Even the first episode, a clip show recapping 'The legend of the Titanic' and 'In search of the Titanic,' overflows with stunningly bad writing in its fragments of new material, and as each subsequent episode briefly recounts the events of the prior, these recaps are also surprisingly clumsy. Accentuating these points: within the last few episodes 'Fantasy Island' finally stops twiddling its thumbs and tries to give us some meaningful plot, but that plot as it presents is barely coherent, and the sheer ineptitude of the writers could not be more evident - especially in the last episode, which bunglingly trips over itself trying to wrap up the narrative.

The English dub is excruciating with regards to both the voice acting, including more wild tonal discrepancy, and in how the vocal tracks are synchronized with the visual cues. Or rather, too often not remotely synchronized; in the worst examples, the animation unmistakably shows a character speaking, but there is no audio at all, or vice versa. In a spirit of generosity that is probably not deserved, maybe we could say that the dubbing is not concretely the fault of Corradi or 'Fantasy Island' in and of themselves. Yet especially seeing as how the dub retains the original Italian theme song, even as the responsibility for this component seemingly lies with Miami-based studio "The Kitchen," I think it surely is another severe mark against the whole; surely Corradi was the one who for some reason approved this dub. Furthermore, just as the animation often includes that strange head bobbing, very frequently there are awkward long pauses and weak pacing in the voice acting and direction that hang too long, then for longer still - the functional equivalent of what in radio is called "dead air." I'm unsure whether this is more or less preferable to some voice acting so foul as to inspire mocking laughter (as in, if you don't laugh, you'll cry).

I guess I can't say I wasn't entertained every now and again. Against all odds there are very scarce, very scattered good story ideas here; in the latter half of the show, the episodes "Encounter with the wolves" and "Jeffrey's confession" can claim the most (and maybe only) earnest, solid writing of the whole shebang. But outside such exceptions, the entertainment this has to offer comes only in the form of a convergence of all those aspects that are so egregious as to totally confound. This includes small moments like the sudden unnerving appearance of Tentacolino, or an unintentionally funny exchange of dialogue. This includes the befuddling "logic" that allows a beat or scene to transpire, or that a beat or scene insinuates in turn; or outrageous writing that takes the concept of "movie magic" - a far-fetched beat to advance the plot in the most gawky manner possible - to stupefying new extremes. Though the music is decent enough, there are also hilarious examples where the music is exercised in a manner that again produces absurd tonal issues. Elsewhere the show unflinchingly mimics scenes from James Cameron's 'Titanic,' and one instance was so breathtaking that I had to pause for several minutes to collect myself. If this is the prevailing sort of value 'Fantasy Island' has to offer, that's not much of a point in its favor.

In every manner that matters, including even the editing, this series is just woefully dreadful. We get the impression of pure laziness, outright incompetence, and a wholesale lack of intelligence on the part of many if not most who were involved, if not all. Every time you think it can't get any worse, it does. I'm genuinely perplexed that Corradi was ever able to get this produced in the first place. At its best there's nothing here that we can't get elsewhere in animation, and even that seems too kind. The series regularly seems to have trouble so much as making up its mind what mood it wants to impart, as the voice acting, character animation, and writing - and music - fly off in different directions while also otherwise being shoddy; there is suggested violence that is stunningly brutal, and some moments are a half-step away from being appropriate for horror. If all this has been too long-winded, however, then let me speak plainly: there is no good reason to watch 'Fantasy Island.' If you, like me, are both curious and masochistic, and are the sort of person who would watch 'The legend of the Titanic' and 'In search of the Titanic,' then there's a rancid sort of logic that extends to also watching 'Fantasy Island.' Be that as it may, this is actually somehow worse than the movies, and one's time is emphatically best spent elsewhere. I cannot recommend this to anyone. Don't say I didn't warn you.